But the king gave this order:“Absalom may go to his own house, but he must never come into my presence.” So, Absalom did not see the king.

2 Samuel 14:24

True and effective reconciliation involves the willful choice of all parties involved. 

All parties must 

• Humble themselves to Christ.
• Humble themselves to each other. 

However, one person can live reconciled while the other remains in bondage of unforgiveness, bitterness, anger and pride.

Really?
Yes.

‍

How can that be?
Look at Jesus.

• Jesus lived and died reconciled to humanity, while much of humanity remains hostile, in bondage of unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, and pride.
• Jesus died to reconcile humanity to God.

“God has devised a way to bring the banished back to Him that they might not be expelled from Him. The way is through the person and work of Jesus, and how He stood in the place of guilty sinners as He hung on the cross and received the punishment that we deserved.” - David Guzik. 

It is possible to live in peace, with a reconciled spirit while others involved reject reconciliation. 

How can this be?

• Humble themselves to Christ.
• Humble themselves to others involved. 

David wasn’t fully committed to being reconciled with Absalom. He initiated reconciliation, but never followed through with it.

• God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.
  Matthew 5:9
• Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.
  Romans 12:18

Jonadab was the instigator in the rape of Tamar. 

“Well,” Jonadab said, “I’ll tell you what to do. Go back to bed and pretend you are ill. When your father comes to see you, ask him to let Tamar come and prepare some food for you. Tell him you’ll feel better if she prepares it as you watch and feeds you with her own hands.”
2 Samuel 13:5

Live reconciled with God and with others.

If you, or someone you know have been through the unspeakable experience of rape, my friend Wendy Blight has encouragement for you. She is a survivor of rape and wrote Hidden Joy In A Dark Corner after her healing.